Congrats! You have officially taken the big step. You’ve either said “yes” to someone special or received the yes you’ve been waiting for! Now the mad rush has begun for you and your fiancé….searching for venues for a wedding, the guest list, bridal parties, and catering. At this point, things may be starting to feel like a big leap rather than a step, which may or may not have caused some arguments between you and your fiancé. Although this is an important time for you both, maybe some of the issues that you both overlooked when you were dating are now coming to the surface. You may be experiencing some struggles in communication, understanding each other’s needs, and expectations for your lifelong partnership. Or maybe you have thought this through, and you are aware that there is more to discuss before your wedding day than just the wedding itself. In either situation, premarital counseling could be a great option for you.
What is premarital counseling? Premarital counseling is when you and your fiancé meet with a counselor who is specifically trained in counseling premarital relationships. The foundation of marriage is established during dating and engagement. Research proves that premarital counseling is becoming even more necessary. Leslie Parrot, the founder of SYMBIS, states 87% of young adults plan on being married eventually and 82% expect to be married for life. Also 76% of married couples say they wish they had pre-marriage education. Couples who do not receive pre-marriage education are more likely to see their problems as atypical and unsolvable. The current divorce rate is between 30-50%, and 41% of those couples say their lack of pre-marriage preparation contributed to their divorce. Meanwhile current research shows that couples who have completed premarital counseling are decreasing their chances of divorce by 31%. Why not safeguard your marriage before it starts?!
An evidenced based report, called the SYMBIS, can help guide premarital counseling. What is the SYMBIS? SYMBIS stands for Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts! The SYMBIS report can promote insight and guide you on your premarital journey. The SYMBIS assessment was developed for those who are newly engaged or couples who are within the first 2 years of marriage. The SYMBIS is also compatible for those who may be getting remarried, and the SYMBIS provides extra materials to help you transition into your new marriage in a healthy way. You can read more about SYMBIS in these two blogs: 3 Key Benefits To The SYMBIS Assessment and Learn More About the SYMBIS Premarital Counseling Assessment.
How does it work? Both you and your fiancé are emailed a questionnaire for you to take separately, which can take anywhere between 30 to 40 minutes to complete. After both assessments are completed, using the information provided, your SYMBIS report is created and sent to your therapist. This 16-page report starts with identifying the overall momentum going into your marriage. The details of your relationship are then measured and divided into 4 domains including both partners’ marriage mindset, individual wellbeing, context, and dynamics of the relationship. The Marriage Mindset details both partners overall attitude towards marriage and their mindset heading into their own marriage. The Wellbeing section identifies the individual wellbeing of each partner and potential caution flags heading into the marriage. The Context section details the couple's social supports, approach to finances, and expectations going into marriage. The Dynamics section is the most extensive portion as it explores the two partners’ personalities and how they interact in the areas of Love and Sex, Attitudes, Communication, Bridging the Gender Gap, Conflict, and Spirituality (if applicable).
Here at The Counseling Collective, Dominic and Britt are Certified SYMBIS premarital counselors and specialize in pre-marriage education. Additionally, Britt and Dominic both have completed both Level 1 and Level 2 trainings in Gottman Method Couples Therapy.
Britt sees clients at both of our locations, as well as online.
Dominic sees clients at our East Petersburg location as well as online.
If you are interested in premarital counseling and/or the SYMBIS assessment, please contact us now! You can do so by filling out our Request Appointment form on our website or call 717-723-8040 extension 100 to schedule with our Client Coordinators. Of note, premarital counseling is not covered by insurance, and is at a self pay rate.